.:: FALL ;

C'est la vie:
Sch's starting soon. Looking forward to it, (I guess) or at least, I ought to. So, on the 2/1/2006 shall be my first day after 2 years, without dhs. Wooh. Looking forward to my mountaineering experience. Oh, and zhou, I don't have to bring a singapore flag up there. Cos, at our dear grandstand, besides nj flag, it's singapore flag. Ok, I'm really hoping we'er NOT taking normal chi next year, and I really hope never to see tkb ever again in my WHOLE LIFE. If this really happens, I'll rejoice, and cheer! Hooray.

Oh, and Hooray for mom! Ha! She ponned dinner (new year dinner) to keep me company! hahas. Excuse: I'm having a cold. But she really is having one though. Me too :( Cool. Dad's stuck at batam.... Lucky he didn't miss the boat/ship/wadever it is. Wow, let's hope he gets stuck there for hm a week? lol. Then nobody would be there to fix my com. Never mind. He doesn't nag at me, so I shall be nice to him. Tsunami, don attack. DON'T ATTACK HIM HOR! OR I ATTACK U! ok touchwood he's still stuck at sea.

Let's hope for his safely return.

Looking forward to school.

OH BIG NEWS BIG NEWS!!!

THERE'S NO OLEVELS CHINESE!!!
OMGOMGOMG!
HAHAS!
I'M JUST TOO HAPPY FOR WORDS!!!!
OMG! I'M CRAZY!
GREAT!
JUST OLEVELS HCL IN YEAR 2!
3 CHEERS FOR ZHIRONG AND NJC!
HOORAY!
Ps. Zhirong, why are u so tall?

lu
9:15 PM

why can't i sign in?
stupid computer...

lu
10:57 PM

c'est la vie:
Wooh, went coffee bean with mom just now. Ooh! Had this nice little chat there. Discussed about Narnia's hidden meanings. Talked lots. Pride, prejudice, dignity, utopian, dystopian, any topic that pops into either one of our brains. Nice.

Oh, talking about pride and prejudice, I've read it for the fourth time now! This time, I took 2 days.

The year is coming to an end.
Shall list out my wishes. In another words, make a wishlist.
1. Have as much money in my wallet as my dad now, BUT IN SING DOLLARS.
2. Get good grades in nj.
3. Perform better in music/ give better perfomances (the later, I doubt would happen)
4. Enjoy nj life.
5. Don't think too much, but think when the time comes.
6. Grow TALL! AND SLEEP WELL!
7. Do better photoshop montages.
8.Be more rational and less emotional. Currently the rates are 1:1
9. Slim down!
Ok, that's about it, too much to accomplish for now. Shall stop here.

lu
9:48 PM

C'est la vie:
Well, narnia is nice. Ok, the filming was great. The lion graphics is fantastic. Ok, puts me into great thoughts after the movie.
Lesson 1: You never know what's gonna happen when you didn't give it a shot.
Lesson 2: those in narnia? the last time i read it was when i was in p6. AT THE MERE AGE OF 11, WHO WOULD BOTHER BOUT THE INNER MEANING?

Ok, shopping today was great. I was going, let's shop for cny. Mom was kinda numb recently, after being in such a tense situation. Finally a break for her. But, she's still kinda numb till after the movie. So whatever I fitted on she said it's NOT NICE. Luckily, gran was beside so she gave comments. HA! Got this pair of real nice PURPLE pants! And a pair of brown ones. Oh, a this real nice green blouse! WOOTS! Oh, and this real nice purple hair accessory! You go guess what's that. It's silvery purple! OMG! I'm so purple today! Everything was great today. Oh, like I've mentioned previously, the colour of the year(next year that is) shall be brown and green! But, my all time fav shall be purple! Oh, and this christmas, I go round like a christmas tree btw, due to my dress code.

ok, shall stop here! Shan't ruin my nice mood!

lu
10:08 PM

C'est la vie:
I'm still not in a great mood. Don't feel like watching movies tomorrow. Nothing worth watching. Narnia? Tell you guys that's the last fantasy story I've ever read. Last (not including harry potter duh). So, you guys should know my story. I wanna cry la. STUPID CINEMA. make me so sad.

Next thing.

Lesson of the day: Whatever that you don't deserve would never be yours. Even if you try getting it using underhand(jian zhao la) methods, you will not get it the way you had wanted it to be.

So, that's the lesson learnt.

Third thing.
I'm not having mood swing. I still don wanna watch movies tml. I'm faithful to my pride and prejudice. I wanna kill myself can? NO! DUH!
kill myself over a movie. Siao. But, I really really really regretted not watching on 1812. Felt so stupid. Shaw/gv/cathay, can you show it again? Sorry la, that day I siao siao didn't wanna watch, now I regret liao, can show? Wow... How brilliant can I get. I've never regretted over something that much ok. NOT dhs, not njc. I'm not interested in any more movies. That's sad right?

Arh, I'm desperate la. No use crying now since it's not showing anymore. You can say I can just watch the dvd, still, I will never find a time when the tv is NOT being occupied. Took me 3 days to finish watching my spiderman dvd, CAN YOU IMAGINE? i don wanna watch on the com, very stupid.

lu
8:29 PM

C'est la vie:

Merry CHRISTMAS!!!!
Hahas!
What a wonderful day!
Wow, I still have warm port in my blood...
Kinda tipsy, shall keep this short.
Thanks to all those who had sent me a christmas card!
Hey I didn't know mom can cook such nice mutton!

Uncle mutton! Don't kena killed by that siao gina EVERYDAY can? Later nobody to kill lambs for me! I sound like this terrible murderer. Anyway, hahas
MERRY CHRISTMAS! ~~Shit~~ , (I shall be nice today) I'm kinda drunk....

still have a day's work tml. gotta polish my dear darling piano before the new year.
Oh, shall blog about the sad thing happening today. Sorta. Ironed my christmas shoppings today. lol. Included my nj uni in them as well. Since I've included nj uni, I thought I shall just iron my dhs blouse. So finally, after so long, it's being removed from the clothes hanger and ironed probably for the last time. Quite sad about it though. It had accomplished it's mission with me...
Ps. oh, and PORT ROCKS! but I'm drunk... Never mind, I'm just a lousy drinker.

lu
9:35 PM

C'est la vie:

Congrats Mum! Hahas! I'm saying sincerely ok! What a great Christmas present! So, it's wonderful champagne today! She says port is for Christmas? Did she get the wrong order? Never mind, she wants port on Christmas. Anyway, I still prefer port to champagne.

The below has nothing to do with the above.

1st lesson of the day: Pirated stuff/pseudo objects, before you know it's fake, will always be real in your heart. There are always 2 faces in life, appearance vs reality, don't go according to your head NOR heart, go according to BOTH.

2nd lesson:
OMG! I wanna cry, somebody comfort me? I'm really crying la. AND I'm 100% NOT pms-ing.

Pride and prejudice is NOT showing anymore.

Sometimes, opportunities are real rare. Cherish it when it's within close proximity, because never again will a similar one be that close to you anymore. I am always lucky actually, I was always bestowed with a second chance. This time, I almost missed the movie sort of. Yet next day it was showing again. My second chance yet I missed it again. A day after my birthday, by right is supposed to be a movie outing but it was cancelled. So, there goes my third chance. Gone gone gone with the wind. 3 great opportunities for a movie yet i didn't grab hold of any, what a lesson?

Now it's not showing anymore, what can I do? yu ku wu lei. Actually , I am crying, for all the lost opportunities altogether now.

In life, the same thing, I was given 3 wonderful opportunities. Hope I'll be cherishing the 3rd one now, because if I don't, everything will go back to zero again.

What a lesson, actually, I ought to be grateful, this lesson was taught with a movie NOT something else (you guys guess yourself). The keyword is really cherish before it's gone leaving you there crying desperately like it's the end of the world.

There are lots of things that I can't bare to think about now, but I must. Cherish what you have now. Once it's gone it may be forever. There's a lot of unthinkable issues now which I must force myself into thinking. There's lots of happenings which I didn't want to store in my memory but I must. Cherish.

Actually, you may think I'm a moron, erh never mind it's ok, me myself now, I'm taking myself as an idiot, crying over a movie that is not showing anymore. But I'm crying for other things as well. So, let me continue.

There are signs that it's not showing anymore, it's leaving the cinema, just like in life, stuff are happening, I tried to ignore, like what I did to the movie. But it's going to happen like that and things would go much worse. I don't what that fatal day to come yet for the movie it did, hopefully it would not come that soon in life no. The last thing I would ever want is that day. Though it's impossible that it'll never come but the later the better.

Still, though unwilling, but I must say, no matter how sad I got over the movie, I must live on without it. Same goes for my life. But no. Let's hope it wouldn't happen.

Can I just ignore the signs and take it that it isn't happening? My brain is too occupied with all these nonsense to think sense. Somebody just talk sense into me before something happens.

I've said to much of the unthinkable. I don't want too much of these in the brain, so I must leave it somewhere else other than my brain, that would be here.

So, I shall stop here.

lu
8:46 PM

C'est la vie:
haha! Happy happenings.
Gluck to my dear friend for goin HCI!
Oh, mum, though i really hate your naggins, gluck tml for ur erhm presentation! AND hope you pass so that we can go out shopping on weekdays again! Actually, even if you don't, we are going shoppin this tues as well! SO, all the best!

So, hope all's well will end well!

lu
9:10 PM

Dunman High

which secondary school (singapore) should you be in?
brought to you by Quizilla

C'est la vie:
Finally got it, proves something though. That I'm not fated there. I got RGS the first time round ok? Well, I was close la, so near yet so far. Never mind, it's all over now, I'm looking for the jc quiz now. Haha! Anyway, I will still wish dhs all the best with it DHP and all dunmanians, gluck! hahas!
Tata!

lu
10:00 PM

birthday

C'est la vie:
Let me just thank you people for wishing me a happy birthday! love you guys! hahas! thanks! lotsa kisses and huggiex!

So, finally, I'm 14, heh, after such a long wait. It's all over now. I had marked the last day of my 13th year wonderfully and meaningfully with a splendid concert at vch. Here I am, from today onwards, abandoning my past.

Ladies and gentlemen, presenting,

THE NEW ME!

Today was the celebration, but my focus shall be my thoughts, since I need a place to vomit my thinkings.

From, today onwards, everything is new and different, I've devoted my 12th and 13th year to dhs. And, now, it's all over, everything. A new journey awaits. People may say that, well it's just an anniversary which may be very personally, but not to me.

I think it signifies something important. The handover of the past and present to the future. It marks a new beginning. My new life in nj, this time. A new chapter. Despite me being very unwilling to close the previous chapter, it all have to end one day. Time and tide waits for no man.

Last night (afternoon actually), as the concert ended with the loud perfect cadence, everything was about to end. The last few hours left. That night, I was thinking of the past, I promised myself that would be the last time I would think of those past. It's nice to continue dashing off without looking back, but I don't have the drive and kinetic energy to do so. The moon apparently hid somewhere over the clouds last night. So, no moon. I spend the night looking at the dark sky. Was romantic though.

Today, the first day being a 14 year old, a very different sensation. From tomorrow onwards, no more looking back. Today's the bridge from the previous me to the new one. I hope I everything would fast forward.

Hope I would scale greater heights in my 14th year! yeah?

lu
9:17 PM

c'est la vie:
ok went for the finals
I'M BRAVE!
To walk along singapore's busiest street WITHOUT A PENNY.
So, this blur me, i put my money inside my key pouch and my ez-link separately, cos the machine can't read through the pouch due to the metal hangers inside. Then, I took out my wallet from my bag and put in the pouch. Suddenly,

I remembered that my dad was in Bugis reading (on his profession duh). (ok not surprising)

I thought that I should pay him a visit after the concert. So, I took my dear key pouch out, to find a dear excuse to visit him. REMEMBER MY MONEY IS STILL IN THE POUCH!

Out of nowhere, came this garang kuni man.

With real loud horns.

After thinking, I forgot what was I doing before this garang kuni man came.

So, I thought it must be nothing important and went off!

WITHOUT A SINGLE PENNY! WOW! but still , ez-link cards can do lotsa stuff nowadays though.

Anyway, while on my way to the mrt station, my mother called.
WHY DIDN'T U BRING UR KEY? I THOUGHT I'VE TOLD U THAT WE'RE (she and my grandma) OUT SHOPPING?

So, I was waiting for her to call actually. So I said, never mind, I can always go to find Dad after the whole thing.

But then she told me the shocking news. And why did you put ur money in your key pouch.

So, there I was dumbstruck. I didn't wanna go back to get my pouch cos' it's real tiring running through and fro. So, luckily there's money in my ez-link if not I would have to run back.

Ahaa, stupid. The concert was nice. I hope that guy would win. Hahas, not cos he's the only guy but his interpretation. Of cos, I wouldn't forget Li-Yundi. For the violin, the lady bah. Partially cos I like mendelssohn, and also her playing.

Oh and met perle and taxy hahas, she was sitting by my left.

As I've mentioned above, I paid my dad a visit at the library. Met Jocelyn and Ying outside the library lol. So, I took this book on the principles of aging sat beside him quietly and started reading. Took him quite a while to realise I was there. Hahas.

Looking forward to tomorrow! Finally, I'm going to annonce smthg tml!
Haha! All the best people!

lu
9:19 PM

C'est la vie:
(*Btw, the below is NOT a poem, just my rantings, the whole world thought i was writing poems...lolx)
Ok, So, I'm not havin a fever.
This year I wanna have everything as simple as I can.
Preferably as quiet as can be.
In silence yes, by myself never.
I will never let that happen.
So after one whole year of fuss, it's all over.
An end is an end.
I'm tired of these.
I'm just a homosapien.
And perhaps an escapist.
Last night's moon was beautiful,
But I apparently can't find my camera when it's just inside my drawer.
How stupid can i get?
Yeah, as I was sayin, I'm an escapist, so I'm tryin to walk away from smthg.
I'm tired actually....

I'll walk away, but I know, I'll be back again....

lu
9:26 PM

C'est la vie:
Ok, had piano lesson this early morning. Kinda pissed before that cos of some stuff. Anyway, pon-ed breakfast cos of my lesson.

Afternoon. Went to meet our dear ceo of china erh u guys go guess who's that bah. Do a bit of maths substitute the first c with y and 2nd c with z see what u get. That's the ceo I was meeting. For stockholders' meetin. ERH? nvm. NOT FUNNY. so dua pai. Made me wait for so long. BUT! I shall forgive and forget. Oh and realise that the coffee at coffee bean and tea leaf makes me feel like SLEEPING? erh... maybe not but, I'm not very awake. It's suppose to keep u awake right?

Anyway, birthday's comin' up. Lotsa new things to expect in the upcomin' year. Lots more challenges await... Would I just end up like these two years. I am regretting now. It's late I know, I didn't cherish these two years. Now, I shall bear the consequences which is to leave it. Well, that's my consequence.... I shall have to live with it. I do miss dhs I'm not this betrayer ok?! I do miss it. But I can't go back... I can't. And I'm really scared and unsure of what's awaiting me. Hope in the new year comin' up, I would be more clear-headed, more awake and more organised. I ought to have been these two years. (Why am I sayin this at the end of every year?) The next time round which would be 2 years later, I probably wouldn't have another lifejacket like this anymore. The next time, it's gonna be real consequence. So, conclusion of the year, cherish every second of your life. Do something meaningful every second. This includes havin a break. It's meaningful ok, after a long year of hardwork. It gathers potential energy. You can't be usin your kinetic energy every single day of your life. You need a break, to gather potential energy. Yes, energy cannot be destroyed yet when you had converted all your potential energy into kinetic energy and passed it on to another object, you run out of energy to go on living. So, every second is your gift, be satisfied with your presents everyday, every second in life is a great present for christmas or birthdays. Cherish the presents you recieve everyday....

lu
10:23 PM

C'est la vie:
Adobe photoshop does wonders! I had finally completed my adobe photoshop movie poster! GV! YOU CAN EMPLOY ME IF YOU WANT! guys check out my friendster dp! Hols is well, enjoyable. Still i'm fat and I don wanna be fat. Anyhow lookin forward to another class outing at seoul garden! hahas! My first was with 2 J'05, FIRST CLASS OUTING AT SEOUL GARDEN. MY another first is gonna be with 06IP04! First outing with friends in my 14th year on Earth! Trying to say that it's gonna be my first gathering with friends on the first day of my 14th year. Aha! This sounds simpler. Cos my bday is on the 18th 10+pm. Yup... Before that I wasn't born yet ok?!

Anyhow! Lookin forward to these and pick up enough courage to pierce my ears!!!

lu
9:50 PM

C'est la vie:
Today, lotsa of stuff happened. Too tired to elaborate. Went from woodlands to bona vista that area. Yupe. Sick and tired, don feel like elaborating.
Oh, here's an interesting conversation with mum tonight.
As usual, I was doing the dishes, it's always me me me. FINE!
Mum kinda threw everything the pots, pans everything into the basin. So I was kinda pissed off( but still, it's better to be pissed off than to be pissed on!)
me: do I have wash EVERYTHING? (kinda stupid question but I was pissed you see?)
Mum(replied sacarstically) :No, you can just do half of them
Me: REALLY?!
Mum: FAKELY!!!
Dad: -.-
Stupid conver....
Anyway, back to yesterday. WENT SHOPPIN! AT J8. Didn't know there's so much to get at J8! Love that place. But somehow the trip was quite demoralizing. THANKS MUM. I really wanted a pair of jeans. I'm serious ok?! I'm sick and tired of pants. So we went out hunting for a pair of SUITABLE one. Which is like one in a million?! The jeans in the stores are getting nicer. Thing is, they are getting BOTH nicer AND skinnier. As for me, I'm getting uglier AND fatter. So, I guess you know the story yeah?! So, my dear mum started suaning me. FINE.
Well, in the end I did find a real nice one that I can fit in! WOOHS! Actually I can cancel off the real nice part la. Looks fine. Got this green top. HEY I LOVE GREEN THIS YEAR! Colour of the year: GREEN ! For my clothes that is. I still love purple, it's almost my lifetime favourite! Yup!

Anyway, mum challenged me to piece my ears but I chickened out. FINE. NVM. I WILL NOT ONE DAY! Forget it. I sux.

That shld be about it.
Today, my only thought for the day is that:
My badminton skills are deteriorating fast.

Yup, guess it's cos I was real tired and I didn't play for a long period of time.
That's about it.
For now, it's Tata!

lu
9:22 PM

C'est la vie:
I need a break...
Music is seriously the last thing u need when u'er sufferin' from moodswings and continuous nightmares/insomnias....
Whatever.
The world is small.
What goes around comes around...

lu
10:09 PM